Just Be My Friend

Comforting

A brand new cancer diagnosis affects not only the recipient but friends, family and co-workers in various and sometimes strange ways. It can scare with stereotypical images of extreme nausea, hair loss, fatigue…early death. These things may or may not come to pass because types of treatment depend on type and stage of the cancer. Get all the facts! Yes, that is vitally important. Families and friends should also “Get all the facts, and don’t be afraid to ask questions.” For the most part, most loved ones tread lightly in the early days sighing that they “don’t know what to say.” Of course that’s only natural. To come right out and speak plainly about fears could include tears. Neither party may be ready for such possible awkwardness, but whoever said it’s time to be brave and act like nothing has changed? Wishing cancer hadn’t come won’t make it so.

The Bible has a few bits of wisdom on how to handle these times of crisis with someone you love who’s battling cancer. Galatians 6:2 simply states; “Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.” Wow! We fulfill the law of Christ as we shoulder the load of those around us. Proverbs 17:17 teaches “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.” It can be very difficult to simply sit with someone undergoing treatment especially in a room full of people harnessed to IV pumps who’ve lost their hair and their ‘get up and go.’ So, how can you just be a friend? Remember Philippians 4:13 – “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” In the same way your friend with cancer must rely on Christ to get through the trial, so too must you draw from His strength to be the kind of friend you want to be – serving and selfless.

Life is forever changed when cancer calls; that’s for sure. Not to hope for complete healing would be silly, however the reality is that the Lord may call some of us home sooner than we planned. I’ve run into a few well meaning people with ideas about healing.  They have said that God doesn’t want us sick. The way to get well is to muster up enough faith, praying the right way, a certain number of times per day and buying the latest teachings on the subject of health and wellness. Others have offered to sign me up with companies who market nutritional supplements that “fight cancer.”  Even though there are definitely some helpful remedies out there, I guess what I’m really saying is that there isn’t a single synthetic treatment on the market that can compare with a simple, kind gesture. Oh, how I’ve been uplifted with being asked “how are you?” “A merry heart makes a cheerful countenance, but by sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken.” (Proverbs 15:13)

By just being a friend in obedience to God’s call to love one another, the mercy of God is made manifest in the body of Christ. It’s been a tremendous and powerful testimony to tell those inside and outside the church how the love of God has been demonstrated by people who don’t even know me. Likewise, God has used these ‘angels’ in human form to teach me how to give more fully to others in need of the same comfort I have received. “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. (2 Corinthians 1:3,4)

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